Returning to the Past or What's Left of It
by Befuzzled
Summary: A girl just sorts out her thoughts before returning home - a 4minute ficlet


RETURNING TO THE PAST, OR WHAT'S LEFT OF IT  
  
She knew she would go back. She couldn't escape it, no matter how hard she tried - that life was apart of her as much as she was apart of it. The little retreat she had been on for the past two year would deter nothing from how it had been.  
  
It would all be the same except for of course her. She had grown, matured, somehow found herself for who she really was not what she had molded herself to be, how others had molded her to be. For the past two year she had been released from the bonds, released from the sanctions that had tied her down and now she was returning. She was returning to the life she left, the people, the goals and aspirations, the expectations and most of all - him.  
  
He was the true reason for her return. She would never admit it out loud though. She was independent, her own person, forthright and foremost. She didn't need to act like some silly girl to get what she wanted. There is a great woman behind every great man, no matter how true that was she didn't want to be somebody's shadow, she was in the spot light - known for her achievements and accomplishments. It was her awards and accolades that she wanted to be shared. No, she would never admit her that her presence was brought on because of a man.  
  
But it all remained the same; they were connected, and bonded with more than just spells and friends. They had love. And it pained her to feel that emotion inside her with no way to fully express it not really. Words were just words and the actions she could think were not yet a possibility. For once in her life she was confused, she couldn't find the answer is some lost book or even fined confidence with her friends - it was all just too complicated.  
  
Never the less she was returning. Unexpected, unplanned and unknown to all that were once important to her, that were still important to her. She didn't know quite how she would make her return, but it would be simple. There would be no welcome home party, no we-missed-you banquet, no nonsense or silly games in her recognition, perhaps just the random ring of a door bell with the shared hugs and embraces and quiet welcome backs. People would know eventually of course and with the news spreading at the speed of the underground most or Europe would know with in the first week. It was still a week.  
  
It would be a week to reacquaint herself with her family, friends, and lifestyle. She would have enough time to settle into the swing of things, get into that familiar rut before it was all destroyed and disrupted. After the cooling off period that would follow until all is once again quite, she would make her move.  
  
The move she should have allowed been made over two years ago. HE this time though wouldn't be the one in control, she would. She had stolen that control when she left and was know going to return it with one question.  
  
That was the plan anyway. She still didn't know if her had moved on after her disappearance. She didn't know if he was able to forget her when she wasn't able to release him from her memory. She didn't know if he would be angry and ridicule her with the guilt of leaving him alone. For all she knew he could be dead or worse snatched up by somebody else - it was quite plausible and that would be far worse than having him deceased. She would be forced to watch him with his lover, unable to be with him, forced to watch him grow old with another while she was stranded, forced to love from a distance for a brief moment that she was scared.  
  
She was scared now too. But, she knew what she had to do, what was right, what was needed to be done. She had to return to London. It wasn't a last choice or option, she wasn't desperate for money, and she wasn't out of a job or a place to stay. She wasn't lacking the skills to survive. She was missing her heart. She had given it away long ago and felt incomplete. She was going to retrieve half and borrow the other half from the person that now possessed hers.  
  
She had found out about herself and learned first hand that she could be great on her own, but none of the praise or response she got would be worth anything. She was nothing without him and was now going back to complete herself, for the greatest thing she will ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.  
  
A/N: Just a brief note. I wrote this piece in about four minutes, I did not reread it before posting, so I apologize for the grammar, spelling, and miss-worded sentences errors. If you see any please point them out (Be brutal). I was avoiding doing actual homework and just started typing. You read the result. This was supposed to be about Hermione returning to Draco after a two year escapade ( It kind of goes along with the sequel to my story Falling Head Over Heels, which I haven't written yet, but I'm thinking about it.) I would like to hear, well read what your first impressions of the story were; I think it would be interesting. 


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